Nervous About Flying Alone? Here's Why It Feels Worse

Hi, I’m Flyman Simon, airline captain and fear of flying coach.

There’s something about flying alone that changes everything.

When you’re travelling with someone else, you chat, you laugh, you look out of the window together. The flight passes. You barely notice the sounds.

Why Does Flying Alone Feel Worse?

On your own, your brain has nothing to distract it.

Suddenly you hear a clunk from somewhere beneath the floor and find yourself wondering what it was. You notice the change in engine tone as the thrust reduces in the climb. You hear a mechanical whirring and feel the aircraft change slightly as the wing changes shape.

None of these things are new. They happen on every single flight. But when you’re alone, your brain goes looking for them.

A lady told me recently that she’s absolutely fine flying with her partner, but the moment she travels solo for work, her mind goes into overdrive. She said it was like flying on a completely different aircraft.

I knew exactly what she meant. Nothing about the aircraft had changed. The only difference was that her brain had nothing else to do.

What Are Those Sounds You Notice When You Fly Alone?

A clunk beneath the floor. That’s the landing gear folding away and the doors closing behind it, just after take-off. You’ll hear the same thing in reverse before landing, when the gear comes back down.

The engines going quieter. Once we’re safely climbing, we ease the power back a little. It’s planned on every flight, and we’re still climbing the whole time.

A mechanical whirring. As we climb away, the flaps and slats come in, and the wing changes back into its clean, efficient shape for the cruise. You’ll hear a whirring sound and may notice a slight change in the way the aircraft feels. That’s all it is.

[Add an image here, such as flaps or landing gear]

How to Feel Calmer When You’re Flying on Your Own

Know what to expect before you go. A sound you’re expecting fades into the background. A sound you’re not expecting sets off alarm bells. The more you know before you board, the less your brain has to go looking for.

Give your mind something to do. Download a film, a podcast or an audiobook before you fly. When you’re travelling alone, you have to be your own distraction.

Let the crew know. Tell the cabin crew you’re a nervous flyer as you board. They see it every day, and they’re brilliant at keeping a quiet eye on you.

Keep your seatbelt loosely fastened. Whenever you’re in your seat, for the whole flight, just like we do on the flight deck. It’s one less thing to think about.

Quick Answers

Why am I more anxious flying alone?

Your brain has nothing to distract it, so it goes looking for every sound and movement that you’d normally never notice.

Is flying alone any less safe?

No. The flight is exactly the same. The only difference is how much of it you notice.

What helps when flying solo?

Knowing what to expect before you go, something to keep your mind busy, and letting the crew know you’re a nervous flyer.

You Don’t Have to Fly Alone

When you’re on your own, there’s nobody next to you to ask, “Is that normal?” That’s exactly why I made Your Pilot Companion.

It’s me, talking you through every stage of your flight as it happens, in 48 short audio chapters you listen to as you fly, with a read-along script so you don’t miss a thing. When the gear comes up or the engines go quiet, you’ll already know what it is and why it’s normal. It’s the next best thing to having a pilot sitting right beside you.

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And if you want more reassuring reads, there are plenty of my Fear of Flying Blogs waiting for you. Just click the ‘Blog’ link at the top of the page and dive in.

Fly Happy, Fly Safe!

Simon

Captain Flyman Simon